I've been watching TV my whole life.
    Some characters I identified with, some not. As a girl, it was all about the "crush", or so I thought.
    Alex P. Keaton. For those of you who were too young to watch TV in the 80's, he was the oldest child on "Family Ties", and he was played by Michael J. Fox. <sigh> Smart, cute, and a complete right-wing Republican. At the time I was, too, but let's just say I've changed more than my sex since high school.
    And he was short! Short! .... Short!
    Since my transition, I've been more aware of the role models around me. Men aren't just sex objects anymore.
    I've seen the difficulty with mainstream icons, too. They're mostly straight. Which doesn't mean they have nothing to offer me, but... I'm still constructing my identity as a man, and being gay is part of that.
    So let me tell you about the Jedi Knights...
    The Jedi... Patient, generous, brave, smart, peaceful, great mind whammy, and they're GAY. <pause> What? Did I see a different movie from the rest of you? We saw Obi-Wan as a young, cocky stud who follows around his older, wiser, virile male companion, saying, "Yes, Mahstah" all the time. Doesn't take a genius to figure it out.
    Just so you know, I'm not the only person who thinks so. The internet is chock full of people, bless their hearts, who write homoerotic and romantic fiction about male characters in movies and on TV.
    Interesting male characters.
    Who are smart, funny, sexy, and GAY!
    When I discovered "slash", as it's called, it was like... like nothing else. It was a revelation to me. Here are all my favorite characters from the media, and they're falling in love with each other! Kissing each other! Giving each other blow-jobs in dark, dirty alleyways!
    What more could a boy want?
    Other than to have a guest appearance on one of the episodes.
    Actually, the Jedi costume is a little out of date. I've moved on, as they say. The Jedi are a nice bunch of guys, but... they're just so... Nice! I prefer a little edge to my role models, if you know what I mean. More within my reach, I think. I don't have the patience of a Jedi.
    I do, however, have the obsessive tenacity of a certain FBI agent.
    Fox Mulder.
    You ever see the X-Files? <sighs> So maybe he's got more of a cliff than an edge. My kinda guy. Smart, good-looking, driven, paranoid, likes pornography, has an oral fixation. Always eating those sunflower seeds, again and again and again... He's clearly bisexual; no straight man dresses that well.
    You gotta know he'd be absolutely fascinated by a tranny. I could be his own, private X-File.
    He could debrief ME.
    <pause> <clear throat>
    Anyways, you can imagine that watching TV around my house is a special experience. Nobody's safe. They're all gay, whenever it suits my fancy.
    And suddenly, there's a whole new world of role-models for me to choose from.
    Thank you.